April 1, 2014
Don't faint. I've decided to start blogging again. I know. It's been a really long time. Like, nearly three years long! What happened was that someone I respected told me I should stop posting such personal stuff on the internet. I see the wisdom in this- I really do. Despite this, I feel like blogging is a wonderful outlet for me and my emotional detritus. I need to work through stuff, and I feel like it's only fair if I can help some folks avoid making the same goofy mistakes I made, by learning from my failures and God's victories.
A few major events have happened in my life in the last several months. The first was that God did a miracle and made a way for us to keep our home in November of 2013. For more than two years, we lived week to week, expecting to find a letter in the mail any day telling us we had to move out. That's what should have happened. That was what we deserved. After all, we were completely unable to pay our mortgage due to health issues and joblessness for two years. Then, out of the blue, God poured out a giant-sized bucket of mercy and grace on us and let us keep our house! Hooray! Yee-haw! Amazing!!!!! Unbelievable, truly. We were so blessed and shocked that it took me weeks to actually believe it was really happening. :-)
The next event which occurred was not so happy. I lost my sweet, beautiful, wonderful, kind, loving, generous, amazing mother to ovarian cancer on January 6, 2014. Most people don't make it five years with the type of cancer she had, but she held on for 5 and half years. She was a fighter filled with incredible courage, as well as hope in her Savior. She never raged. She never complained. She just trusted her Abba and rested in Him. We were heart-broken to lose her and caught off-guard. She was so strong, up until the last two weeks, that we just couldn't imagine her dying. Yet she slipped quietly away in her bed in the hospice care center in the middle of the night, with her beloved Randy by her side. I miss her every single day. She was my dearest girl friend. I'm so, so sorry that she is gone, but I am so grateful to know that she is in a place of perfect peace and joy and she would NEVER choose to return to this earth if she had the choice to make. Where she is, is the place we were all created to experience. Heaven is our destiny and our hope. And now I long for it quite a bit more, knowing she is waiting there for me. I miss you, Mama. So much.
The next life-changing event is definitely less sad, but still very challenging. My stepfather Randy, whom I call Papa, has laid down a challenge for me to lose 100 pounds in the next two years. I have always struggled with my weight, but the last few years, with all the financial and emotional stress, have helped me pack on the weight to an extreme degree. My sweet Mama was always concerned about my weight and had encouraged me in every possible way to pursue good health over the years. I know it was important to her that I get to healthy weight, so I could live a long and happy life, and so I could be a good example to my children. Knowing that, and taking to heart my Papa's challenge, I have decided that this is the time. I am going to take life by the horns. I am not going to let food master me any more; instead I will master it. I am choosing to fight back and take control and do something about my health and my weight!
I have kind of a crunchy-granola approach to nutrition at this point, as I've been learning the value of eating whole, unprocessed foods and avoiding white sugar and flour and other empty calories. I've gotten to love eating coconut oil and chia seeds. I make my own kefir water. We drink unprocessed milk. We're not exactly typical Americans when it comes to food, so I knew it would take a special program to meet my needs. I sought wisdom from my sister Heather in TN, who is a bottomless well of information regarding all things nutritionally sound. She recommended to me a program called Trim Healthy Mamas, which allows you take whatever nutritional approach you choose, as long as you follow their principles for meal planning. I will be free to enjoy my coconut oil and chia seeds all day long! Yea! I ordered the book and am anxiously awaiting the arrival of this 600 page tome! It's written by two Aussie sisters who love Jesus and it's totally a grass-roots success, all self-published, with amazing results for thousands of women!
I am also committing to a fitness program to get in shape. In the past, when I've lost weight, exercise has always been a critical factor. I an already doing walks outside or on the treadmill several times a week and Pilates (for lower body and back) and weights (for arms) three times a week. I have also spoken to a dear friend who is a personal trainer. Papa had offered to pay for a fitness/diet plan, so I asked if I could hire her to be my trainer and accountability person through this weight loss process. Instead, she told me she could not take my money, but that she really wants to help me for free because of our friendship. What a blessing! :-) She has been a personal trainer for many years and helped hundreds of people achieve their weight and fitness goals. I am so excited to have someone like her on board with me, pulling alongside me.
The final huge event in my life in recent days has been my acceptance to nursing school at Inver Hills Community College. 250 people applied and only 50 were chosen. I am humbled and delighted to be one of the 50 people beginning nursing school this August! I can hardly wait. Meanwhile, I am taking Microbiology and Medical Anthropology this spring and tutoring at school 16 hours a week. I also work as a nursing assistant doing home health care and filling in occasionally at a local Memory Care facility. Three part time jobs and school and kids. It's really keeping me busy!
I guess that's all I've got to say for now. I just needed to put this truth out into the world, to make this an official turning point in my life. Father, give me the grace I need to daily to live a healthy life, and to only eat to nourish my body. I cling to You. You are my hope and my help and my assurance of victory. Thank You, Abba, for your extreme grace and for all you are doing in my life. You are amazing! And please tell my Mom I said hello and give her a hug from me. I miss her so much.
